Bride fuming as guests ‘upstage’ her by following black tie rule as she wore H&M dress
Sometimes, if a dress code isn’t given for an event, it may leave people confused as to what to wear.
But when an event specifically says black tie, then you’d have to accept that it’s time to dress to impress – and these days, that can be done on a budget.
When one woman turned up to the wedding dressed to the nines, but the bride’s family were not, she was confused.
She took to Reddit to explain: “My family and I are from Albania but we live in the US. My cousin David got married to his wife Lizzie this weekend. In Albania we always go all out for weddings and David wanted to keep many cultural traditions. Lizzie didn’t like the idea.
“Lizzie had sent out the invites via mail and also had some rules written down as in no kids allowed, black tie dress code, absolutely no plus ones unless both bride and groom approve of the +1.
“I am engaged and i thought my fiancé would be included but David said Lizzie is against plus +1. I said that even if Lizzie is against it, my fiancé has been in the family for years, way longer than Lizzie has been around plus he’s a friend of David as well so he would come as a friend.
“David was frustrated and said Lizzie has set down most of these rules and whenever he goes against her she gets mad so we should cut him some slack and just bear it for his sake. I thought it was ridiculous how he didn’t stand up for himself but not my business after all.
“All of my Albanian side side-eyed the fact that the wedding was kid-free because we are used to involving kids at weddings. The bride and her family refused to make any compromises about it and show respect to David and his wishes. But again none of our business despite our frustration.
“Despite the black tie dress code, most of the bride’s family turned up in jeans and flannel shirts and the women just wore casual maxi dresses. Our side of the family dressed more formal. The bride just wore a white knee-length lace dress from H&M.
“The reception took place in a cabin by the lake which had animal head trophies hanged on the walls. The only music we heard was some slow pop songs and then country music. Every time the dj tried to play some traditional Balkan music, the bride’s family would get him to change it.
“The bride also made a big deal out of the fact that we were dressed formal and how we overdid it – we upstaged her. She kept complaining about it all night long and was throwing tantrums to David about how we as his family are very disrespectful.
“Lizzie also implied that David’s sister looks like a high-end escort with her outfit but David’s sister tried to keep it together for David’s sake. After constant insults thrown around all night long I told her to chill out. She said she won’t chill out because we disrespected her.
“I told her first of all if she was scared she was going to be upstaged she shouldn’t request black tie dress code and secondly to be honest it was not that hard to upstage her because I’ve seen grandma dresses fancier than the one she’s wearing so she is the underdressed one for her own wedding which was supposed to be a black tie event.
“David’s entire family sided with me but David said that I’m an ahole for speaking to the bride like that on her wedding day. I told him that if the bride requires kindness she should start from herself. Am I the ahole?”
People were equally as confused about the dress code requirements, with one writing: “Don’t request black tie if you actually mean smart-casual.”
Someone replied: “Smart casual? Her family was in jeans and flannel shirts – decidedly casual-casual!”
One fumed: “Black tie is already a f**king nightmare. Imagine getting all dolled up to find that they meant to wear your jeans that don’t have rips. This is why I have trust issues.”
“Black tie means tuxes. Way more formal than a typical wedding where a suit is appropriate”, one quipped.
One suggested the new wife was disrespectful, writing: “I’ve never been to a Balkan wedding but I imagine it to be as extravagant to the ones we have in West Africa – wife set herself up and sounds like she has no respect for your culture.”